Begins with a set up that should be familiar to many Midwestern students: a tornado drill. The concept of avoiding the mighty power of a tornado by gathering in a hallway and hoping it doesn't notice you is ripe for comedic possibilities.

Jack has the students form a fake cult to sabotage Principal Durbin's new school uniforms; Mary, Stef and Michelle prepare to see one of their favorite artists who is in town to perform.

Jack attempts to get closer with the guys at work by inviting them over for a game night; Helen helps Principal Durbin grow a backbone; Stef and Mary try to coax information out of Michelle about the court case she was a juror on.

When the A.P. Bio students reunite Jack with his deadbeat dad, Jack plots revenge by trying to expose his allegedly reformed father; a witch foretells of a grim future for Mary, Stef and Michelle that divides the women.

When Jack discovers his new girlfriend's therapy homework requires dating him, he turns the tables on her; Principal Durbin goes undercover to determine which faculty member is most worthy of a very special prize.

A parody of '90s teen romance movies (Third Eye Blind soundtrack and all) in which a lovable schlub (Victor) goes for the popular girl and can't realize his true love was in front of him the whole time.

When Jack's girlfriend says she's going to dinner with a male friend, a jealous Jack tags along; Principal Durbin, Mary, Stef and Michelle take Helen out to cheer her up after a breakup.

Jack is enraged to find that the A.P. Bio students have stolen his beloved Harvard pen after he asked them not to touch it; Principal Durbin and Helen repeatedly fail the superintendent's inspections.